Its.. been a year =)

that's right, it have been a year since the first post of this blog.
This mean today is the 1 year anniversary of my little crapping box haha.
So..looking back at my coolection of posts (only 39 of them) ,
i can t help but to wonder what was i thinking at that time..
some time it's just silly.
but i can really say it's been a major year for me.
i did alot of thing i ve nvr dreamed of
went through queite a number of experince
be it bitter or sweet.

i've learned that sometimes thing just isnt what you think it is.
how the way some people look at thing is totally different than yourself.
and you cant your own perspective to assume matters of other people.

but most importantly..
i ve learn that
sometimes..if you could step out of your comfort zone instead of playing it safe all the time.
you might be pleasantly surprise at how rewarding it would be =)

some people might say its silly to express these kind of self-doubt
and to have so many question for the future.
they say it is time to grow up..
to be mature.. and to be always 100% sure about your action and your next step.

but, this also mean you will fail to notice any room for imporvement.
if being mature means being stuck in a state where everything is already certain..
i'd rather stay put on the process of growing up..

i guess you can call me a big baby if you wan..
but... i will never stop growing =) or at least i hope so.

Good night.

Someone like you, someone like me

someday.. someday, i will be good enough. =)
keep stepping forward*

and and oh. if everything goes perfectly i am starting my own online song cover soon
i ve always been admiring those people posting covers on youtube

@o@that's my definition of sexy!

keep wondering if i have any chance to meet more people like them in daily life

dont you think they are just so cool, talented and comfortable in their own skin?  =)

lots of the time they cover sounds even better than the original! (worship)

but i have a feeling that it will suck really bad if i try to make one 0.<

but whatever, i 'm not doing it for the views
but instead it serve as a huge motivation to upgrade my (non-existing >.<) skills to the next level
be it video, guitars, vocal
its definitely a good way to stay on track~

till then! =)

good night

Gotta love'em!

My, my Films that capture those innocent period of our life are sure getting popular these days---
however to be honest, i still prefer "First Love"
more than ''you are the apple of my eye"

probably because 那些年 tends to exaggerate lots of silly things like 打手枪 and 勃起 lolz

while  俩连这件小事 manage to focus on little things that matters a lot..
things like..
going to the toilet just to catch a glimpse of that person you like, leaving small present for them, act like you dont care when you are really jealous of something or even keeping a soda in a fridge and refusing to drink it because that special someone brought it for you.
yep, all those little thing that although seems simple.. but takes lots of courage to do =)

but still，那些年 is a great movie
it depends on which one is more relateable with your life i guess =)

and thanks longz for pointing out that the jacket that the girl wear resembles my course night jacket.
i guess the RXX store at jusco belakong stole the design from this movie and they modify the hook to be a little bit smaller and the fastener to be triangles instead of semi-oval.=.=

good job~we nailed the performance! =)

anyways aside from this
this two film do have the same theme

i realise that alot of thing comes down to miscommunication...

be it too much too soon or too little too late
once u didt express yourself clear enough
lots of crap will start happening
starting to get unsure
starting to second guess
starting to be suspicious
starting to 胡思乱想

 in the end... a simple thing can become so complicated

one point i don't understand  is why in the world will go pak tor with 阿何 for 5months
i think that is one big turning point in the story
i think its very wrong for  沈嘉宜 to do that
whether its an effort to make 柯腾 jealous
or to mend her broken heart
its just very...hmm i dunno.. =(

although 柯腾is immature in his own way with the fight competition and things..
but nonetheless.. he never resort to using other people as a rebound =)

then again.. i guess i'm not in position to judge anyone also la =P

but if there's one thing i know..
then it is... to always be straight forward
no games no playing hard to get

people say this kind of people will always 吃亏
i admit sometime it's true...
but.. i believe it will pay in the long run

after all..only things that can endure the flow of time are worth treasuring =)

if getting hurt every now and then...is what it take to find these things..
then count me in! =)
 人生就是不停的奋斗!


 
i'm sry.. but overall.. First Love is still my favourite flim down the memory lane =)
and.. that reminds me test 2 is slowly creeping up! O.<

Winter Child ♫♪

겨울에 태어난 아름다운 당신은
눈처럼 깨끗한 나만의 당신

하지만 봄, 여름과 가을, 겨울
언제나 맑고 깨끗해

겨울에 태어난 아름다운 당신은
눈처럼 깨끗한 나만의 당신

생일 축하합니다. 생일 축하합니다
생일 축하합니다. 당신의 생일을

Happy Birthday To You
(Happy Birthday To You)
Happy Birthday To You
(Happy Birthday To You)




*Voice that melts the toughest of masks
feels like everything will be alright*

happy 11.11.11 to all the winter child =)

Stay pretty, as always ★

aha finally can sit down and type adi  :P

its funny how sometime when you feel that tml is going to be a good day
but it turned out really bad

but when you feel like tml is going to be really lousy
everything turn out fine instead

그러나..
괜찮아 =)
these ups and down of life.
i already learn t how to laugh at it and accept it.

studies, assignments and stuff lidat keeps popping out
can really 影响 our mood
turning everyone into unhappy and nasty zombies
naturally
its  perfectly normal to feel kinda stuffy and trapped under all this crap..

but dont let it get into you

for better or worse it was going to happen anyway
so instead of feeling sorry for yourself
why not just face it all with a smile on your face? =)

maybe it will turn out to be a good day? you ll never know 

so remember to stay happy!
알았어??

An interesting turn =)

Just when I though I;ve seen it all

life throws another surprise for me

**

Recently..
someone sang a song for me =)

(thankyou^^ before this I was really burning out but now i feel like I can take on the world )

It a first time for me, I never feel something lidat b4

Because b4 this its always the other way round X.x

I have to admit..once in a while,Its kinda sweet to have people do something special for you for a change =)

i think girls that can sing are very interesting people =)

maybe its because singing is something that come out from the heart.(not yelling and jiwang-ish =.= but for harmless fun, maybe)

maybe because when you re singing,

u put down all your mask and the wall around you

all those pretentious gesture is gone

and you let your true self come out.

For me, nothing is more important than being in touch with your feeling  =)

Although it may not seem much..it is actually a really brave thing to do

when people really sing their heart out

they are actually exposing themselves

they are vulnerable

they are actually confessing their feeling to the audience

and..i salute them for that

because..there’s not a lot of people who act how they feel these day

and I understand there are many reason for that too

maybe its because they are afraid of how other people will judge them

maybe they are afraid that they will get hurt

in the end, they act the direct opposite of what they really feel.

Perhaps this could explain why sometimes it is hard to sing properly in front of people you dun know very well =)

trying so hard not to embarrass yourself

but at the same time you hold back all the good things you are trying to let out.

Yes, perhaps sometime it is important to be accepted by people around you

But it’s a habit of human to feel threatened by things that they can’t control

How many times you’ve heard people say ‘’aiya, dun wan la..ltr xxx’’ when deep inside they really want to go for it?

Is it because it is not acceptable by the people around them?

Or is it because it is not what they expect about themselves?

I wish I know the answer..

It is like..they rather choose to live up to other people expectation then doing what their heart tell s them to do.

How many have it been that..you got what you want..

but lost what you need..

Weird right? How singing can link to so many thing

Anyway,take it with a pinch of salt.

It’s Just something to think about.

Aright, Good night =) and cheers to all the people who embrace their feeling.

Home

perhaps this week is exceptionally tiring
it makes me want to go home more than ever before

To go home means
to the place where no one expects me to be anyone but myself

away from those school work and reports
away from the abrasive and superficial people i have to face everyday

where i can finish that plan to turn that grass field into a barbeque yard with my dad and help my mom with all the fish that need to be cut and cleaned

where i can learn to play my favorite songs through the internet while strumming away on my bed
where i can catch watch the 8.30pm drama
where i can join the laugh with my sister watching 娱乐百分百

where i can tease my brother about how he's so obsessed about Miku Hatsune and the whole family of Vocaloids

where i don't need to worry about what to eat on my next meal and maybe annoy my bratty little cousin for not finishing his rice

i want to go home
where everything feels right =)

but still, maybe its another chance for me to learn to deal with the adversaries in my life.
besides, all the juniors are very nice!
i will do my best to guide and take good care of them.

yep, i think i can survive 1 more week... no problem =)

来了大学一年，人性见多了
可能是成长环境不一样
跟城市的人相比之下，发觉自己真的 俗气很多
不善于油嘴滑腔，也不懂得讲什么很‘in'的话来吸引大众
这些都是有待改进的地方
但是。。我不会因此而感到纳闷
因为我就是我啊 =) 我很满意自己被抚养长大的方式
就算再一次出生 也只爱您 =)

aha..its done

finally its over
a breath of fresh air
it went a little bit rough in the beginning due to some unforeseen problem
i totally overlooked the mono and stereo problem.
i thought what sounds good in my head phone will come out well in the speaker as well =.=
i didt take my time to test it all out and...
bottom line, all i can say is it's really my fault =(
and i screw up what could be a wonderful opening for the pesta tanglung
really make my head spin @.@
but in the end, the event turned out pretty well thanks to the solid performance of the MCs and Entertainers.

speaking of which... 
this event is really an eye opener
one part is because it was my first experience as technician (a lousy one =.=) at a sizable event 
but also because i'm doing a special favor for.....
well i better dun mention her name here (KYC ahem*)
she say i always think too nicely of people and  she wanted to prove me wrong

under her so-called social experiment,i manage to notice things that aren't usually that obvious
how every coin have its flip side and back side
i am really surprised at how quickly people perspective on you can change
especially those who didt know you well
all it takes is a little bit change in hair style, what you wear and the way you talk and way you walk.
as much as i hate to admit it
it quite interesting to see how people react to your different style of approach.
and it's also fun to see myself doing something i normally would not do (totally overdone it x.x)
there's time i had to stop myself from laughing on the spot. XD

oh ya... i also wonder why i kept thinking that other course is always more fun than chemistry

but it's kinda out of my usual style to say the least =.=
its an eye opener for sure
but still, it felt weird
and i'm not doing any of those anytime soon
time to get back to myself!
because i would not want to miss out on the real people and the real thing that will last =O
superficial, shallow and fake stuffs please go away~!
 

so KYC tai ka jie, i hope you got plenty to write on your phycology thesis ltr =.= coz i am not going to do it again. and oh, sry for accidentally erasing your PR contents two times x.x
but nevertheless, thanks for this special experience working as "undercover"

but anyway..
behind those joy and laughter
all we need is those who will stand by you whenever anything happen
and make sure you got their back too
or at least, that's what a kampung boy like me can ask for. =P
for me, these people are the people that matter most to me =)
really, really thanks to you all

this is basically the thing i have in my mind and wanted to say just now
but somehow it came out really lame

perhaps its just a typical Scorpio thing?
keep too much on the inside but dunno how to let it out.

but i am sure those who understand me can understand it too
but then again these people only comes far and few between.
and i am lucky to have met quite a few of them in my lifetime
anyways..really have to work on my public speaking skill X.X

really feels like Song Sam Dong right now..=.= haha


this i usually when i want to just sleep through the morning
and sing ''today i dun feel like doing anything~"

but at last no, still have this evening half finished report need to do
and need to summit b4 tomorrow 1 o'clock
plus, its just the beginning of the week
in addition to the MGM tang yuan and stuffs...X.X argh

good night, be true to yourself and be happy with your life~

hmm?

*yay~~time for another cheesy post*

they say changes is always nice
really, it is..and i couldn't agree more
and you did great putting yourself out there too =)
i can really see the courage and effort

the funny thing is..
i found myself suddenly unable to react to it x.X
or should i say don't know how to react?  
maybe its just me? =P hah

but anyway..

i really hope that..
despite all of this
you are still being yourself
because that is what set you apart form other people =)
 
goodnight and oh, try not to make yourself too tired k?

x.x but still =)

haha..i'm down with fever again these few days
perhaps its the sudden change of environment or maybe a change in diet
for some reason..i always seems to fell sick on the begining of every sem =/
at any rate, i should really learn to take good care of myself while being away from home

good night, and rest well =)

Step into the Unknown

new semester
new subjects
looking at all those uncertainties and unknowns

myself?
i hope everything turns out okay

and oh, good morning!

Carried Away (my bad)

kennedy ng yin yong, u are one unprofessional videomaker
you spent the last 2 hours watching this when you r suppose to be animating. >=(

不管妳现在怎么樣了, 我都想谢謝妳、祝福妳。
因为妳，我改变了自己。

想一想，回头一看，才发现原来初恋这件小事。。。
不简单 =)

언젠가 만날 내 꿈을향..해

I was looking at my dream that is being deemed far away
And I was standing blankly
I don’t have anything left any more
I thought about giving up everything, but
I am standing up again

Even today step by step
I step forward carefully
My heart is full of fears
but it’s an excitement I’m embracing
I am staggering and shaking
But, I step forward towards
the dream that I am going to meet some day

As I’m thinking if it’s going to end like this
A fear constantly comes
I’m hesitating but
Deep inside my heart
There’s an unstoppable beating
that drags me forward

Even today step by step
I step forward carefully
My heart is full of fears
but it’s an excitement I’m embracing
I am staggering and shaking
But, I step forward towards
the dream that I am going to meet some day

Towards the dream that I am going to meet some day

A bird on your shoulder? about dreams and life (cheesy stuffs)

alright its time for another post of random thoughts
so its going to be a little bit preachy
turst me, i dont like people 讲耶稣 myself, coz some of them is just really unrealistic and unpractical =(

but recently, i came across a movie based on a true story about a dying old man who is very wise (nop,not Dumbledore =.=)

it really caught my attention.

in the movie, he talks about how people are throwing their life away everday
and how good will it be if all of them had a bird on their shoulder to remind them.(younger generation)

so basicly here's how it works.( or at least to my understanding..)

imagine there's a bird on your shoulder
and everyday you wake up
you look to your shoulder ask the bird:
''so..is this it? is it the day i'm going to die?
''i'm ready?"
''am i leading the life that i've always wanted?''
''am i going to regert anything if the lights goes off today?''

but how does this make any sense?
well, as you all know,every people have their own dreams to follow.
we r always looking forward to this and that
we spent alot of time thinking about what will we do when that very moment come
in other words..most of us is living in the future
sometimes,to the extends that we dont really care what's happening now.

if we know that we re going to die tomorrow.
we ll be living our life differently.
those things we really want to do, but delayed because we r afraid, or thinking that there will always be tomorrow.
i bet we will do it all in a day

having dreams and expectations in life is always great
but we must also live our life to the fullest everyday!

and fullest does not mean jam packing your days with activities
but instead live the life u wanted to live, and be the person you wanted to be.
because we would't know when our plugs will be pulled
and when it happens, i really wanna be ready for it =)

so, have you ask the bird on your shoulder today?


edit**
ah, i found this clip of the movie, its called ''Tuesdays with morrie'',
had to go through the tv guidelines of a few past newspaper because i dont even know its title =.=
(its on 4th August 10.00pm 8TV)

this is the part where he mentioned the bird near end of this video (7.45)
check it out if you're interested.

Good Night.

I'm Back

Yes, i'm back
in one piece =D

okay.. maybe in a bigger piece becoz of the outbursts of eating habits in Indonesia.

hmm should i talk about the trip?
basicly,there's lot of eating, sight-eeing and shopping
i dun think i can finish it here and people probalby wont be interested in hearing me babling about it anways =)
but anyways enough to say i have lots of fun ^^
the highlight of the trip is where my aount brought us to a mall where the price is pasar malan standard. clothes and fashionable dress which normally reach RM50-RM100++ in Malaysia are price at 25krp-90krp.(RM7-RM30) there o.0 and you can bargain with them for an even lower price.
The quality is superb as well, its not like all those supposely 'in'
outfits in those stores with wierd names in Malaysia's mall
(sungei wang for example) that can be torned very easily.
I usually call those clothes lala装 XD.

Well, you'd probably noticed that i keep comparing indonesia and malaysia.
it may get annoying sometimes, i know
forgive me, but it's my way of looking at life.
for me,traveling to other place and then making a comparison with where i come from
really widen my horizon.
it's a way to remind myself that there's more in life for me to look forward to =)


And oh, finally i got my hands on the DVD sets of Athena =)
i've been waiting so long to watch this.
well, it cause me 28000rp. which is roughly RM9
and it comes with 4 Dics
the quality is really awesome for a pirated DVD (guilty! ><)
it is so high defenition that cant believe it when i ask the guy at the booth to test-play it for me.

and i must say that its not what i expected..
it's Better! =D
I always though the main character to be one of those stereotypic cool and macho spy-guy.
But He turn out to be a playful, easy-going and a-fool-in-love kinda guy.
but nevertheless he is serious on his job and is a very bright spy
the heroine on the other hand.. is a hardcore double-crossing cold-blooded killer o.0!

The story is unique in the sense that the bad guy isnt all that bad after all, and the good guys isnt all that perfect themself
Well, i would't want to go and spoil the show for anyone reading this.
all i can say is go watch it~

I'm halfway through the drama now.
can't wait to see the ending.
but i need to control myself to just wacthing an episode a day
because i've still got some stuffs to take care of before the holiday ends.

Good Night. =)

Take Off!

So.. i am fleeing to my Uncle's place at Jakarta
For most people here, when they talk about Indonesia, poverty and social problem usually comes to mind first.
Well thats not all true but its not all wrong either =/
Well, i really need to clarify something here, Indonesia is actually much more developed than malaysia. In other words, they have what we have, but we dont have what they have..
4D cinemas and giant size shopping mall are everywhere.
the food there is really awesome too
the traditional food is one thing
but all the popular franchise like Tao, Sushi Tei, Korean Bbq, Zanmai (am i spelling it wrong?), there seems to have better service and quality than that of malaysia.
everything comes in statisfyingly big serving
unlike in malaysia where sushi always seems tad strunken =.= ew

which is why i am ready to put on a few pounds during this trip hahas
well,u know what they say~
today we eat, diet and excersice? aiya tomorrow la =p

On a sidenote, the people there is really polite too.
I dunno why, but in Malaysia its really hard to see people greeting each other on the go.

What really amazed me is the fact that the pakcik makcik at the tourist spot can speak really fluent korean, japanese and chinese and their english..omg.. they can get a band 6 no problem.

but nevertheless the finacial gap in Indonesia is really big, poor people are very poor and rich people getting richer and richer.

There are people trying to sell your things all over the tourist attraction and people knocking on your window at the traffic light to sell you mineral water and tissues.
its something we will never see in malaysia.
The first time it happen to me i thought the guy is trying rob us X.x

Well, come to think of it, perhaps Malaysia does have some good in it (aside from the incredible corruption and straight out lies from the politicans that is =.=)

Alright, the plane is going to leave in a couple of hour.
and i wanted to make a confession before i go..
actually i am quite a nervous flyer, though most of the time i didt show it
so i'll just go ahead and quote
"if i didt make it back home, remember me as i was"
 X.x??

All I hear is raindrops ♪~ ♫~

recently, i look at my blog archieve and wonder if there's anyone with posts count lower than me
come on, 2 post in a month? x.x
i've also notice that i didt post much picture
every post is just wordsss

and oh ya, about the unconventional background music..
for some reason i always prefer the live version over the studio recorded one

and these video usually have a brief introduction at the begining
so i can imagine how people will react when they open a blog and suddenly start hearing dialogue.

总而言之 i felt sorry for any unsuspecting visiter to my blog.

anyway, i have the oppourtunity to work with guys from rtm the pass few days.

all i can say is..aside from filming..
there're sure alot of makan time
makan pagi,brunch, makan tengahari, minum petang, makan malam, supper
gosh...and all sponsored by the company so it's free
but with a props-master erning up to 4-5k and production manager around 12k per month (depending on how many shooting session)
i 'd say there's definately money in the mass-comm field. =)
well, too bad i'm just a chemistry guy

yay~

but then again ..i dun think i'll be keeping the money
coz it's not even a proper job..
ok, maybe i ll take rm200  =P
and the rest of it will be use to cover the flight tickets buy new pairs of jeans for my brother and my sis for the upcoming jakarta trip
why jeans?
dunno, i just though it will be cool to wear it and remind myself "hey, this is from working with tv crew."
(turns out that MAS and AirAsia decided to rise the fee) =.=.....
does that make any sense? =.=
anyways, never underestimate the power of a pair of comfortable jeans =O

well that's all for now
got a bus to catch tomorrow morning..
i was suppose to get down just after Juru tol
praying that i didt doze off and ended up somewhere else x.x

goodnight =)

Sometimes..

look around you, there's more to life

haha, well, at least that's wat i think the movie is trying to say =)

super 8, although is not as widely advertised like X-man first class or the green lantern, is actually a very special movie.

life can be unfair
bad things can happen
sometimes u feel like things are falling apart
and the world is closing up on you

but if u manage to pick up the pieaces
learn to work with what you have
to accept what've happen
and to let go
look around,you might find new things worth looking forward to

there you go, that's my highly cryptic and abstrack review of the movie.
i'd say go watch it for yourself
it's really rewarding and statisfying experience especially if you have a large popcorns with you haha
even the ending credit is great, so dont rush to get out of the cinema =)

happy father's day

and oh, good night

Looking Back & Looking Forward prt.1

the internet have been down these fewdays haiz..snailmyx
so whenever i open my laptop i ll be busy organizing all the file and pictures in my computer..
and it's very painstaking trying to sort them into their own catergory...course night..steamboat..k-12...baksis8..outings...its endless x.x
well its the digital age..people now go trigger-happy on their camera..taking picture
of anything anywhere anytime..
gone is the times where we need to be very careful with what we are snapping because the camera is running on limited film
and there's no way to tell how the picture turn out
well..at least not after taking it to the shop to have it washed and arranged neatly in a album..
then u flipped through it hoping that everything turned out okay..
but even if it's not.. it's okay..there's something about holding and looking at a photo that u just cant feel when staring into the screen.
not to mention there're only around 36 picture at a time..
so..it makes u appreciate more each and every picture you've taken..
i guess it's pretty much like making friends..
sometimes less is more
well.. i dunno..maybe it's just me..~.~

anyways..looking at those recent picture..
only that i realise things've changed so much over the years
kuala sungai baru is a small fishery town i am currently living in.
nothing much fancy is going on in this town..everything is actually pretty basic..u got the restaurant..the school..the market, 7evelen, groceries..there's no club, arcade, big mall or specialised outlet like guitar/toy store.
infact the nearest KFC is like on another town 15min drive away.

life is rather simple here,everyone (adult) had their job to do..and as a student..you wake up you go to school and you come back.
everyday is pretty much the same.
its funny to think back how everyone will be waiting infront of the tv around 6-7pm for the prime time drama like journey to the west, condor hero, strom raider etc and everyone will be talking about it the next day in school

when korean drama started to come to malaysia, the time change to 8.30pm instead hahas
and one of the first drama i wacthed is 'glass shoes' it was okay.. but the one that really leave an impact on me is 'love story in havard'
with 金来沅 playing as 贤宇

the show is about the ups and downs of his life as a student in havard law school and how he work his way up after having a hard time in the begining.

i like how his personality plays a bigger role than his look
not to mention the girl is really pretty as well =)

even on the more recent drama "食客" he acted in,the goofy but charming personality is still there
that's what important in life right?
looks and beuty will fade away sooner or later
but nothing can take away that heartful smile from your face =)

somehow they didt make this kind of drama anymore
now most 偶像剧 actors seem to try too hard to be cool every single scene
and it gets boring sumtime =/

after the wave of k-pop hit malaysia around 2005..
'rain' was the topic of the girls in the class but i didt get the hype. i was more into english song that time and i dont understand a single word 'rain' is singing in his song ~.~''
but occasionally i will laugh my ass off wacthing korean variaty show with my sister (with subtitle ofcoz). i believe one of the first one i watched is 'love letter'.

going to Malaka Town is an occasion that is far in between so its a very exciting everytime..haha i know..what a noob right? =.=
btw melaka town is 1hour away from my house ..so there :p
but now that i am older..its becoming not a big deal..but still it's fun.

anyways this is the town in lived in since my family moved back from perak to melaka when i was 10
(still, i was born in melaka, but i was just too young to remember anything before my family moved to perak)

yep that pretty much means that half of my life was here and half of my life was in other place =)
well.. is that a good thing or a bad thing?
again..i dont know..it depends on how you see it actually.
should i talk about what the first 10 years of my life was like?
well..that's alot to process..
perhaps i should save it for another time

heh actually i just wanted to mention about things that happened in Uni after going through the pics.
but i seem to be drifting away from the topic..
because many things came into my mind while typing this..
nvm i will just go ahead and name it part 1
but anyway that's all for now =)

Nice Guys Finish Last~

Nice guys finish last
That's why i'll treat you like trash
It's not what i really wanna do

You only date bad guy
So i'll give it my best try
to treat you the way you want me to

But behind the scenes...

She means the world to me
I wanna tell her that she's beautiful
and show her that she's loved

Hold her hand when she's scared
Tell her how much i cared
But that wont' win her heart..

because..

Nice guys finish last(?)

Left or Right

Its almost the end of the month..and everyone is excited because pay day is almost here
but..for me.. it signals the end of my job
well..basiclly ..my elder brother will start his part time soon (next month) and the shop is too busy to be run by my parents alone..
so someone had to stay and help out..and that person happened to be me
i dont have any problem with that..
its just that..i was hoping to use this 4 months to help me reach my target for my personal saving before i am 25 years old which i set for myself
but..its okay, i understand..my parents really needed an extra hand..
but the good news is that i will have more time for myself =)
because..come to think of it..the working hour of my current job is way too long anyways..perhaps this is a good turn?

haha..i just cant believe that it would end so soon
i was just getting good at it..
i haven even got the chance to blog about it.. which i said i would
well..i guess that's one good example of why we should not hessitate about the thing we want to do..
because it could be gone before we knew it =/

Cake Dance~(on the road)

always thought delivering a cake...is..
well.. a piece of cake
but today i get to exprience it first hand - on my
co-worker's bike

never thought it would be that hard
the cake is wobbling like hell the whole time
and i struggled like a retard =.=

haha =) reminds me of an animation i saw when i was in form 3


it certainly brings back memory

Happy B-day, Mom

Of love and of loneliness

to be in love or to be lonely..
at a first glance, it appears that these two are the opposite of each other...
but actually....
these two are not related at all..

basicly..loneliness is created by our concious mind while true love is not sumthing that can be rationalised or reasoned

we dont go "owh, XXX always helped me when i am in trouble, so i decided to fall in love with XXX" it just doesnt work that way

love is......when you saw that special someone, your heart beats faster, you feel like your words doesnt come out right, and you either become too queit or too talkative..
you hard to act normal (>o<) but ended up acting like an idiot...
and you beat yourself over it after that (x.x)
and,and,and..you dont even care if his/her hair is in good shape today or wheater they 穿美美 or not
before you know it..you are smiling just out of nowhere
ya...its that feeling..=)

in short, incase of love...the feeling comes before the reasoning

loneliness on the other hand manifest itself only when we think about it

ok lets see an example =)

you are alone in your room..or.. you think that your handphone doesnt ring as much as other people..or..you think that you have noone to share your thoughts and... so on (there are just too many different forms of loneliness)
then your mind begin to reason and.. you decided that you are -in your own opinion-LONELY.
then the negative feeling kicks in..you are wondering why things are lidat...is there something wrong with you..why people can this and why people can that...etc..etc.etc
and finally they blame themself for everything when bad things happen..
then they withdraw themself from people..which cause them to feel more lonely and the cycle it goes on....
the thing is...there is nothing wrong with them and nothing to be blamed for =\
people are only as lonely as they think they are
and most of the time..they are not as lonely as they think
(heh...sry if it sounds confusing)

in the end... it all falls into what your think of yourself..
loneliness cannot be cured by surrounding yourself with 'friend', having fun 24/7 or having one lorry of of gf or bf.
it is after all.. in your mind.

speaking of bf/gf..
never make loneliness as an excuse to be in a relationship
it may take your mind of the feeling of loneliness for awhile
but the guilt willeat you alive 0.0

i know a couple of people who get in to a relationship just so that they could tell themself ''i have a gf/bf, i am not lonely ^^''
initially they seemed very happy but after sometime they discovered that the 'feeling' (yes, that special feeling =)) isn't really there..and realized that they got together for the wrong reason..
when they broke up..they get lonely...and they get into the wrong kind of relationship again..it like a never ending heart break =/

that is why the most important thing is... to just be yourself and be happy with it =)
and being happy is Not about being outgoing, overly friendly or talkative all the times

there is nothing wrong if you like to do things alone
everyone should learn to enjoy their own company
there is nothing wrong if you dont party day and night
it will start to feel meaningless after sometime
there is nothing wrong if you are quiet because you cant think of what to say
if you dont have anything to say in a conversation.. then dont..
listen to what other people are saying..
and say what comes naturally to you.

i personally think people who talk for the sake of talking very irritating..
they will do anything to keeep the conversation going..it like..if there's even one moment of silience the akwardness will kill them =.=
blah blah blah alot of 废话和鸟话 they ended up talking alot without saying anything.

if you are really confortable with that someone, you dont need to talk much and it would't feel akward as well.
it like...that time when your pa~ or ma~ or jie~ drove you home..you are feeling tired and not feeling like talking much.. you just glance at the passing view from the side window while they are driving witout saying anything..and yet.. there is not akwardness..
(haha sry.. i m just giving and example here..notice i didt put 'ko~' there because my brother driving skill is very gai =.= and i have to keep an eye on him when he drives)

everyone will sometimes, someday or eventually feel lonely and it is perfectly normal.
it is biologicaly progarmed in us to to feel that way so that could coexist instead of fighting to be the stand one standing (i know..i know... i sound like a geek now =.=)

so dont make a big deal out of it and dont let it takeover you

learn to love and be comfortable with yourself
then you can love others
不要被寂寞打败 =)

p/s :  phew..longest post ever..=.= tml got work....oklah..i gtg get some shut eye first ZZzzz(thinking of blogging about my job in next post..but who knows~)*

Don't lose yourself

There's nothing wrong with it

stop worrying

and

Just be yourself

우리 둘만의~Sweet Holiday

Phew finally 2nd sem is officially over
annoucing the begining of 4 months of holiday

Oh yeah, still remember the debate on what to do with all the time?
I think will be doing all of them! =)

oh, and and..My part time job will start tml
basicly, some motorcycle shop tauke need someone to work on their account
and .. i have always wanted to try my hands on 做账.. new skill ftw!
but i think the pay isnt going to be too good though..
because it depend on the work load and hour..no bill..no pay =(

but the upside of this is that the place is very near to my house which is why i think that i should be able to do my own thing when i get back home.
Well, anyways let's see how it turned out first.

actually i wanted to write more..but for now i still need to arrange my stuff first x.x
good luck for those still having exams okay? and take care =)

난 "바보"라서

Well...let's say that they are people who would't mind to put effort on something that wont benefit them.

They have tendecies to stay up after an event or a function to clean up the mess when everyone's gone...
say yes to a request eventhough it only add more trouble to their alredy packed sechdule...
doing jobs that other people dun wan to do..and things lidat.


most of the people might think that they are only doing this because they wan people to accept them or in other words ‘做给人家看’
that might be true..
but so far, from what i see..these thing comes naturally to them..they are not trying to get attention or anything..
it is just what they do, they are just being themselves =)
[but then again there are those who is really just '做给人家看’or most probably '做给"某"个人看'  but its easy to tell anyway >.0]*

but the truth is... these people are usually the ones that is less appreciated..
a good example is your mother that work day and night for you and you still lawan cakap..and complain this complain that.><

On the other hand, the popular guy or girl will always be the one would careless about other people..a.k.a. 有性格

yes..human is strange..O.o


actually these 'fools' not all that rare
even in university, a place where it's everyone for themselves
i manage to notice a few of my frens are indeed..ahem*
and the funny thing is..when i look at them..
they kinda remind me of myself
yep..somehow i m quite a fool myself sometimes
true, most of the time it won't end well for us..people may even call us "siao的"
but that's just what we do... because I'm a fool =)

Distractions :(

hoho home at last
ever notice that evrything is better at home?
no need to wonder what to eat
no crappy hotspot
clean floor
no 20sen/litre Dr. Sukida
feels like there're better things to do than to study :/
but that will have to wait..
aish...final
continue to deep fry my brain in books* (-(oo)-)
ciao~

HI =)

these is one of the many funny things i encounter everyday eversince i moved in to UPM

....u walk pass someone u meet occasionally (your detached senior...someone you met from an acticity a while back)
...they caught a glimpse of you..but quickly looked away...
....u tried to say hi.. but they pretend you wernt even there...
...and then u have call out they name so that they will atleast pretend they just saw you and respond to you (or worst, sometime it goes completely unheard and u risk looking like an idiot infront of other people.)

perhaps its the risk looking like an idiot part that cause everyone (othere than your close friends ofcoz) to appears to be so unapproacable...and its highly contagious..

i think i am begining to see the logic here...
didt make the first move = no risk looking like an idiot = no hurt

..people are afriad of getting hurt
we are terrified that if we put ourself out there, being vulnerable for even once, and people still walk out from us anyway. we will end out feeling very sorry for ourself.

but i didt like this at all....why cant we just say hi to people we like? :/

but what the heck =) i will continue to put myself out there and hopes for the best
because that's what life is for right? we got hurt and we grow. there's nothing to be afriad of!

HI^^

btw...aigoo...when they want to officially release it? ><

.

Almost there..i think

A-YO! its really been a while since the last post.
First year in uni is almost ending but i m still deciding what to do with the 4 month :O should  i get a job, train more skills or get a head start in study?(yeah right :P)
anyways lots of interesting thing happen in this sem.
Tomorrow is my final paper for test 2 and honestly i admit that i ve nvr been so 'unprepared' for the test before
Yet.. i am here blogging away (my time management is really 'gai')
And..I got sick just yesterday night for staring at computer for too long trying to design promotional notice for the seniors.
I posted in on fb group so they can comment on it incase of any error
And one senior start to ask questions, i reply to him saying that dun ask me 'what' to change but instead 'tell' me what to change because i am merely designing the thing based on the info i receive. After all, i am not the one planning the event :(
Then i think the senior thinks that i am mocking him (lawan cakap) and got upset....i am like.Zzzz
Worst of all, other senior start to hammer me... ><
I dun get how a simple post can evolve into an argument lidat
I have no problem taking hits and critics from senior but seriously why must he act as if he's the victim here when there's really nothing to be upset about >:(
Haiz...seniors really got alot of 'patern'... if i am senior will sure very 'brader' with my junior one =)
But then again, next sem is my turn to be senior..i hope everything turns out okay.  popi popi first

Still feeling abit sick now.
I am in a mess until tomorrow 10am >< wish me luck!

Why

right, its been awhile..more ups and down after CNY
the first week week was kinda rough, exam asignment and things lidat.
and. Lately i've discovered that somehow...well.. evrything i do seems to cause speculation.
they just had to saysumthing each time you make a move.
Maybe i should just do nothing? :/

alright enuff ranting XD,  anyways happy valentine's days for u all  out there. =)

oh listen,listen,listen, girl

mixed feeling
how cool was itwhen i recall  how cool it is during our  primary secondary school when new year really means letting yourself go
and now... i 'm staring at a buck load of homework :/ and housework

Nothing better than you~ you,you,you,you~

i guess this line will be looping in my head for the whole holiday then

4th week the work load is  starting to get overwhelming..
possitions,homework,exam,preformance..stuffs pops out here and there..
and they all want a piece of me.
not even sure the holiday is enuff.
i guess i'm just not good at saying 'no' to people :(

arg...what can i say..its life =)

Little something that makes me smile

its the 3rd week and i must say its getting better and better.
i cant really describe it. but lots of little good things happened to me since last week
i guess it adds up as a whole =)
now i feel like evrything is going to turn out okay.

tomorrow is taipusam..haha sry i just pakai spell only
and i need to go buy ticket for malaysian open this saturday..
yep, straight to bukit jalil after koku.

this shall be my first time buying ticket to watch live sport in a stadium
i was practically dragged by my friend to go watch.
well, its RM30 or so for a premiun seat..sounds okay to me.

makes me laugh when i think of last sem that time when one of my other friend spent rm250++ only to watch jyj appear for like...45min?
i told her it must've been the most expensive 45min of her life..XD

okaylah no offense k, fangirls gotta be fangirls. 

Why we r lidat? :/

As a small town boyOnly In university
I begin to notice that
We are a funny species
Friendly infront  of everyday people
But froze up upon the people we truly care
Unable to express ourself
We missed out on alot of things

I got a feeling~

Hahaha its the end of first week. Having fun yet?
Some says there nothing to do. But i'm alredy feeling the heat..well.. may be a little bit.

Anyways.. notice the difference between how guys and girls celebrate thier friend's birthday?
For Girls...they r guaranteed an outing (another reason to go shopping i persume...) haha okay okay just kidding..no hard feelings =)

For guys..we prefer the more traditional ways. like cavemens...we strom into the '寿星公'  room in the middle of the night and annoys the host. The point is to disturb their bedtime, usually involve 'singing' (if u want to call that). Suddenly someone bring in the cake =) Hey, guys love supprises too okay? =P This usually followed by more singing and laughing and it goes on....sometimes until 3am.

Then on the next day, all the suspect involved will wake up feeling like crap in class and while the host wonder where his pillow has gone.

Well, boys will be boys.